Rebuilding Trust When Your Boss Has Lost It In You
- Priya Venkatesan
- Jul 31
- 2 min read
Your boss can lose trust in you for various reasons including:
Not delivering outcomes as expected
Lack of thought leadership
Lack of relationship building
Misunderstanding
Conflicting view points
They don't like you
Insecurity
Whatever be the reason, there is a solid consequence on your work life.
Trust takes years to build, seconds to break, and forever to repair. ~ Warren Buffett
The sure shot way to prolong your agony when you have lost trust is by:
Holding a grudge
Taking a morally higher ground
Complaining
Sulking
Making your boss a villain in your head and attributing all negative qualities on to them
Becoming aggressive/ passive aggressive
Not engaging.
Various scientific studies on trust repair including (Bachmann et al., 2015, Dirks et al., 2009, Fulmer and Gelfand, 2012, Gillespie and Siebert, 2018, Kim, 2018, Kramer and Lewicki, 2010, Lewicki and Brinsfield, 2017) point to the below global strategies to earn trust:
Apology
Denial
Reticence
Accept Responsibility
Compensation
Penance
Emotional Support
Systemic organisational reform
Cultural Reform
Replacement
Co-creation
Before you opt for any of the above, reflect upon:
What do you need to acknowledge in the "here and the now"? Eg: Trust is broken/ May take time to rebuild / My intent / New work relationship equation.
What is your motive behind the trust repair exercise? Prove that I am right / Compromise / Genuinely need a second chance / Better work equation / Better collaboration / Repentance etc.
What is the best outcome that could come out if it? Career Growth / Better relationships / Sponsorship / Feeling good about who you are etc.
What do you need to communicate to your boss about the whole idea of trust repair? Apology / Intent to repair / Actions you will take / What is in it for the boss?
What systems do I put in place that will prevent me from losing credibility again? Risk mitigation strategies / Better planning / Seek collaboration / Learn etc
What support do I need to make this happen? My team's buy-in / Stakeholder cooperation / Budget / Resources etc.
The moment you take responsibility for everything in your life, is the moment you can change anything in your life. - Hal Elrod
How do you rebuild trust?